How to handle insufficiently dressed females
J.D. Carriere (via Steve Skojec) has some excellent advice for men:
You have, Dear Reader, perhaps had stuck between your teeth something vegetable; a poppy seed, spinach, whatnot.
Likewise indecent exposure. To rectify one’s unintended display, be it buffet or bosom, it is always better to know.
So when a lady has fallen the rest of the way out of her summer top, it is not proper for the gentleman to assume she meant to, whatever the prevailing fashion of the place.
Though he be divided between his own discomfort at raising the topic and the plight, unsightly or otherwise, of the hapless lass, the truly decent gentleman willingly undertakes in all things to subordinate his own comfort in service to the other.
He may not shirk, lest, imagine the tumult, the exposed lady next meet her clergyman or her grandfather.
Neither may he snicker or leer. Leering is to be saved for his wife and snickering for later.
So the gentleman will proceed, delicately, thus:
“Forgive my noticing, Miss, but to save you a felony charge it is my profound discomfiture to inform you that you appear to have misplaced your areola. Not, mind you, that it is lost. Rather, Miss, you see it is very much in evidence. I thought it best you should know. Good day.”.
His duty done, he may retire for cocktails.
San Diego County: All deputy clerks must perform same-sex “marriages”
County clerk reneges on religious accommodation.
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Non-Californians shouldn’t get complacent. The Lavender Army is coming to your state, city and neighborhood.
Etc.
To those of you out there in flyover country: please don’t let this sneak up on you. Thousands of California refugees may soon be looking for a state that hasn’t turned into a lunatic asylum. We’re counting on you.
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